indolence, a guilty pleasure
the domestic minx
26 Comments
Slow down, you move too fast.
You got to make the morning last.
Just kicking down the cobble stones.
Looking for fun and feelin' groovy.
Oh, the subject of Guilty Pleasures is a delicious one, is it not?
I promised you more of the Guilty Pleasures, dear readers, and you shall have it, for I am wont to talk about Pleasure, of course.
It is intrinsic to who I am.
Indeed, I am a Hedonist, a Libertine and an unabashed Bacchanalian Minx of decadent proportions.
And while guilt is a vile and dirty word, it's association with stolen pleasures works much like whiskey does with coke. It sexes it up. It makes it naughty.
But guilty pleasures are all relative. There is no guilt unless the pleasure is forbidden, verboten, incongruous perhaps with the mask one uses to face the world.
Naughtiness is neutered, the thrill is killed if all is condoned.
Is fruit not sweeter when it is forbidden?
Chocolate? Sex?
So, what might the forbidden fruit be for someone consumed with moving at a mercurial pace, being boundlessly busy and literally up to one's neck in it?
Surely it must be a wallowing in sheer and unadulterated indolence and the simple joy of going slow.
Yes it is and I can assure you, having had my pedal to the metal, I fully appreciate the slow burn, the luscious langour and the simple joy of taking it down a notch.
I have spent a good portion of my life travelling too fast, juggling balls and dodging bullets.
I wanted my sex hard and fast, my coffee instant and my drinks down the hatch! Quicksticks!
Biting off more than I could chew was an obsession where even my obsessions became an obsession and deadlines became dangerously addictive.
Desperate to cram so much into my days, I neglected precious moments unnoticed, delicious details of minutes slipping through my fingers like water, a melange of minutiae beautiful yet blurred in the hurry that was my busy life.
It was with almost maniacal delight that when my eldest son was 2 and my newborn baby only 2 months old I opened a children's boutique. Although my pregnancy had been spent building our new house, I had nurtured my creative venture, along with my growing belly, painting the ancient shop from top to bottom, as soon as post-caesar stretching would allow.
You will agree that I was manic when I tell you that not only did I manage the shop, organize fashion parades, handle the buying and keep the books, I also hand sewed entire nursery ensembles from curtains to cot quilts, from padded, pocketed nappy bags to bassinets and soft toys. There was not a minute in the day that I was not engaged in something utterly demanding. And there were children to nurture with one to be breast fed. It was insane and I loved it.
After suffering from post natal depression with my first child and determined not to allow a minute to ponder my navel, I threw myself headlong into ordered chaos.
When it all slipped into comfortable routine I added part-time teaching to the mix.
With my mum picking up the slack, I now had two little children, a business, a teaching position, a home to be decorated and a swag of sewing jobs to manage. I did it all. But it still wasn't enough.
Shortly afterwards, my husband accepted a job in Indonesia which took him into the middle of the jungle for six weeks at a time, returning for two. This should have been my cue to take a break, but I chose only to sell my boutique, simultaneously accepting an offer to return to full-time teaching, totally convinced of my super hero powers.
It was only when, four years later, with my husband holding up his hands and admitting he was tired of the dysentry, malaria and being ignored for two weeks when he came home, that I packed in my job and, quite unexpectedly packed the family up to go and live in Bali.
It was a delicious change of pace.
Business was home schooling, surfing every day and relentless backpacking. The busiest I got was frogmarching the boys 3km along the sandy beach for a nasi goreng and an iced tea.
But life on a tropical island doesn't last forever and our subsequent repatriation saw a return to old habits, new obsessions.
There were always jobs to over-do, houses to renovate, children to operate.
It took repeated bursts of expatriation and an utter wallowing in The Good Life to undo some of the damage.
While having maidservants meant it was easy to obsess and over-do in the way I found impossible not to, the fallout was always covered, the mundane was always attended to and the collateral damage was negligible.
I could be compulsive and a creature of decadence. I could burn the candle at both ends, schizophrenically.
And indeed I was the ultimate workaholic/party girl until a green eyed monster with a very big gun, a hail of ammunition and a bullet I couldn't dodge, stopped me.
Yes, dear readers, I was injured badly, my self-worth critically so.
And it changed my life.
In a good way.
I chose to lick my wounds and take a breather. Sabbatical style, I retreated from the full-time workforce and learned to sit still.
Oh, I continue to obsess. I still love life in the fast lane. I can't help biting off more than I can chew and I juggle.
But, through cruel chance, I have made a delicious discovery.
Slow cooking.
I take my time now, I am indolent when I dare, and oh, is it lovely!
And it feels naughty, in the most delicious of ways.
But it is a pleasure. And I delight in feeling a fancy, fluffy faux guilt about it, so much richer is the sauce...
In fact, I am considering slipping my nubile body into a bath of slow bubbles right now.
Why? Because I can...because I want to...
and because I really shouldn't...
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Reader Comments (26)
Sound like you might be the late wifes twin! No 0 to 60 just 60 to 120. There was no 0.
But my little minx is it just too naughty and decadent for Norman to imagine your nubile form slipping into a luxuriant bath and emerging covered in delicious fragrant bubbles.
Sherwing!
Oh Minx that sounds so utterly inviting...A long hot silky bubble bath and I think I will divulge a little bit more and read my Pirate Prince Romance Novel while I am at it :) loved the post dear Minx!
Oh soooo inviting, (you had me right from Simon and Garfunkle)...I do indeed need to slow down, for some ME time.
Oh, its official. Tonight's plans:
Bubble bath
Harry Belafonte on my iPod
Champagne in hand
You are the best party planner ever.
xoxo
Darling Norman,
Oh please imagine me for not having stayed in there too long - for then I may be simply pruney and waterlogged!
Ahh, it is so hard to find balance...
Water does it nicely - especially hot and bubbly...
Speed becomes delightfully inconsequential...
xx
Oh it is such an indulgence isn't it Lady Terri...
an escape..
like one of your raunchy reads...
What a lovely combination -
bubbles and bawdiness!
xx
Oh yes Meleah!
While speed thrills, it also kills..
and sometimes it is the simple pleasures that are the collateral damage...
Take time to indulge and be indolent.
Your heart and soul will thank you for it.
xx
Oh Kitty darling,
I have outdone myself!!
Bath, Belafonte and Bubbly!!
May I join you?
xx
Good God send me some of that slow.
I'm still in the fast lane of my own making and not sure hoe to get off. It's peculiarly addictive. Relaxation should be too - but it feels so....
I wholeheartedly endorse the hedonistic, indulgent side of life.
In fact, I would go so far as to say that every second of every day is 'me time'.
Enjoy your bath, Ms. Minx. And do let me know if you require assistance in scrubbing your back.
i am given very few opportunities for self indulgence, but this post gives me hope... i will keep my eyes and ears open for opportunity, and should she knock,, i will do my best to open
I LOVE it. Hum, a bubble bath, oh I think I should take a lesson from you minx. Slow! next week! Honest.Bubble bath, watch a movie and if guilt creeps in I will think minx said so, she said so.
My delicious Minx...how I adore you! One of these days I too shall slow down, once I've made the money I need to no longer have to care about money. I'm a lazy creature prone to lingerings and lounging about on soft furnishings and gazing off into space contemplating the meaning of life. This crazy fast paced life I'm leading right now is kicking my ass.
Not much further now my little dumpling...not much further.
Can I get in on that bubble bath? I haven't had one in ten years and I need one DESPERATELY!
xoxo
Mistress M
wow, never knew about bali. great story, great message. i too am guilty of living at that intense pace (work hard, play hard) which always culminates in the decision that i need to slow it and seek sabatical. have a great weekend.
life is for living! your life sounds so full and inspiring...routine...who wants routine?!
I have a little slow I could send you, Michelle.
While I love it, I can't have TOO much of it...
I really can't...
It's best to share it around..
xx
Oh dear Lord,
We should get along famously...
I'm not called Mimi Minx for nothing...
And being the hedonistic and indulgent creature that I am, I do so like it when someone is there to do the hard work for me - like scrubbing my back.
I will expect you soon...
xx
Oh Paisley darling,
If I were closer I would knock on the door for you and offer you an opportunity to share in some of my indulgent decadence.
A lazy lunch, liquid and langorous.
The invitation is open...
xx
You must only add bubbles to the bath dear Jafabrit x
Absolutely no guilt!
Oh, maybe just a little... so that it is a little more delicious..
And if anyone DARES to sniff at your decadence tell them MINX SAID SO!!
xx
My delicious and adorable Mistress Margot x
I am running you a bath right now...
So rich and frothy with bubbles is it, that you will sink into it's deep and delectable warmth and not want to lift your beautiful, busy little body from it unless it is absolutely necessary...
And sometimes it isn't, is it...
We do need to switch off..
Tune in turn off, drop out...
I have, at times, been all about money..
I only spent it faster...
Mind you, I won't deny it is a delicious lubrication...
Much like a glass of shiraz and some decent bath bubbles...
I have a glass ready, darling!
Hurry over before the bathwater goes cold!!
xx